Thursday, 25 February 2010

Guilty VS SHIT

opinions appreciated

Would you rather...
feel guilty because someone guilt-tripped you into doing a favour for them and you refuse to abide by them but you've stood up for yourself [even though its a harsh thing to do]


abide by their requests but end up feeling shit and disappointed at yourself. (because even if you know its the right thing to do for them but you always always always do this and feel like shit everytime and you're disappointed because you feel like you can't stand up for yourself.

Basically, there is an event on saturday that has been organised for ages and i really want to go, because I'm 20 and it's my life. I already let people know that i couldn't work on that day and people were fine with it. However, my dad called and told me i had to work because i was a supposed to be standby and basically guilt-tripped me by putting an insane amount of pressure on me-

I hate it when they put that kind of pressure on me, THATS NOT FAIR, I'M NOT SUPPOSED TO BE THE SCAPEGOAT FOR EVERYTHING THE RESTAURANT IS. but he's my parent, what am i supposed to say? I just don't want to be tied down by obligations like that, especially just because i'm born into it. I didn't ask for it.

Do i be the bad daughter, but do right for me? or do i be the good daughter and end up feeling shit and disappointed because it gives them reason to do it again and again?


Jamilla Camel said...

Tell them that a lack of planning on their part does not constitute an emergency on yours!

You did the right things...tell him to hire agency staff!

Yin said...

@jamilla: Thanks for the advice. I'm racking my brains trying to find a compromise, but there really isn't. The only compromise i can do is work on friday which im already doing. =/

The adult inside me is telling me to stick to my guns, because disappointing yourself is the worst thing you can do to yourself.

but the daughter in me is thinking about the disappointment with my parents.

siigh. I'll work it out. =)

C. said...

=( is the event far from the restaurant? maybe you can be on call instead. I know how you feel, my parents do the same thing to me because they own a restaurant too.

go with your gut instinct first, because they are your parents and eventually will move on. but if the restaurant gets outta control, go in, and think like SATC "leave a party early when youre still wanted" =)

Joe said...

That was a good story. I'm wondering if u got to go do what you wanted to go do.